Heather Mills Is Deeply Disturbed

Heather Mills has become untethered from reality and is slowly floating away into space. I mean it - bitch is gone. Delusional. Imagining things. Conspiracies. Yes, against her. For instance, Heather has become convinced that the media are trying to destroy her. This is what this woman actually believes. That all the TV networks and newspapers and magazines in Britain are in league against her. Here's what she actually told the BBC several days ago:

There is a huge agenda about trying to destroy me and put me down. ... There are huge powers. I don't have that powerful system that Paul has. There are huge powers that create these things for their own reasons. I have a daughter to protect and I don't want to speak badly about any of the parties involved.

Heather the victim. She plays that card well. And she's playing it again. According to Heather, Paul McCartney and his media minions are deliberately trying to over-shadow her attempt to rehabilitate her image by appearing on Dancing With the Stars. The other evening, Paul had a date with Sabrina Guinness, a rich socialite who once went out with Prince Charles. Naturally, because of the names involved, it was a big story - so big that the date was eventually called off due to the presence of so many photographers. Heather, because she's a lunatic, thought the date was planned deliberately to take publicity away from her, and was said to be "apoplectic with rage" when she learned about it. Here's what a friend of Heather's told the Daily Mail:

She was livid. She felt like someone had knocked the stuffing out of her. She feels this has really humiliated her. Heather has long believed forces are at work trying to destroy her and she feels this is just the next step. ... In Heather's mind, she feels this has actually been done when she is out of the country to overshadow her American television debut. ... She told everyone that [Paul] had sent her flowers to wish her good luck in the contest, and that he was really on her side. But she feels that the minute she leaves the country, he is pictured going out with someone else.

Only a truly paranoid, tortured mind could've concocted the stuff Heather believes. A conspiracy against her? Why? She was nothing before she married McCartney, and she'll be nothing again once everyone forgets about the divorce. She can appear on a hundred reality shows and it won't make a difference - she'll still be the hateful one-legged harpy who tried to smear Paul McCartney's name.

But what's funny about it is that Heather actually seems jealous of Paul for seeing another woman. Here's what Heather's "friend" told the Daily Mail about that:

Deep down, Heather believed that after the divorce, they would still eventually be friends and that she would always be a very important part of Paul's life. ... Now she feels rather anxious that she just may be forgotten when Paul moves onto someone else.

That is insane. I mean, this is the same woman who, a few months ago, was talking about the secret tapes she had that would prove Paul abused her. This is the same woman who claimed Paul stabbed her and pushed her over a table and sadistically tortured her by making her crawl to the toilet in the middle of the night. But Paul was just supposed to forget about that and be buddies with her? And I love that last line, "Now she feels rather anxious that she just may be forgotten when Paul moves onto someone else." Well, yes Heather - you're divorcing him. Divorce means you won't be his wife anymore. He'll be free to screw other women if he wants to. And I seriously doubt he'll be thinking of you while he's doing it. In fact, you're probably the last thing in the world Paul ever wants to think about again. But you're anxious he'll forget you - of course you are, because you know, deep down, that without him you're nothing. Being married to him afforded you a lot of opportunities for looking noble and caring, and now those opportunities are drying up. You're so desperate for publicity that you signed up for a reality show, and had yourself videotaped breaking into a pig-farm with a bunch of smelly, trouble-making animal rights activists. What next? Are you going to pop your plastic leg off and do some kind of hopping juggler act in the street? My God woman, wake up. He doesn't want you anymore. He figured out what kind of a devious, scheming little monster you are, and now he just wants to be rid of you. And you're such a neurotic wreck that you can't let go of him. You say the most horrible things about him, trying to get people to feel sorry for you, and then you expect all that to go away at your convenience. You do know that people write those things down, right? It's all on the record. You don't just get to pretend it never happened because now you want to be friends. Holy God, I'm actually afraid of you, Heather. You may be the craziest person I've ever heard of.

(source 1, source 2)

Report: Mills Settles With McCartney

News of the World reports that Heather Mills has surrendered in her divorce battle with Paul McCartney, dropping her demand for sole custody of their daughter Beatrice in exchange for $60 million in cash and property.

"It's amazing how quickly things have turned around," sources told NOTW. "Heather has caved in on lots of things — including the money demands and sole custody of daughter Beatrice — and we now expect her to settle."

The tab reports that, despite the apparent civility between McCartney and Mills in court, they have actually been at each other's throats in private. One alleged phone exchange between the ex-couple saw McCartney yelling at Mills, "I just can't wait until I never have to see your face again!" and Mills retorting, "You'll never get rid of me!" McCartney also called Mills tacky for agreeing to appear on the show Dancing With the Stars, predicting that Mills would become, "a reality TV freak like Anna Nicole Smith."

But what does this mean for Mills's claims that McCartney abused her? A Mills friend says Heather has not backed down from her accusations, and vows she will never sign any agreement that forces her to keep her mouth shut. And another friend accuses Paul of wanting to settle the affair quickly to avoid evidence of his abuse coming up in court:

What McCartney has done is categorically deny the wife-beating, saying it's disgraceful and disgusting, then settle so she won't have a chance to show the evidence to back up what she said. ... I know that Paul's worn her down and she got completely fed up with the whole thing. But he'll never keep her quiet.

Crabbie has been on Team McCartney during this whole sordid mess, mostly because it's so hilarious making fun of peg-leg Heather, but honestly, I'm starting to think maybe Mills's abuse claims are not without foundation. It think it's altogether possible that McCartney really is the monster Mills tried to portray him as. I also think that Heather is a completely vile gold-digging bitch who probably deserved to get cuffed around. I suspect that, if we knew the whole truth about this story, we wouldn't like either of these people very much.

(source)

Mills Shot Down By Judge

Heather Mills tried playing hardball in her divorce battle against Paul McCartney - but it appears the strategy has blown up in her face. In court proceedings yesterday, the judge dismissed Mills's outrageous accusations against McCartney, including ones that had the former Beatle pushing her into a bathtub, choking her and stabbing her with a broken wine glass. One-legged twat Mills reportedly stormed out of the courthouse after the proceedings ended, while Paul emerged twenty minutes later smiling.

When is Heather Mills going to wake up and realize that she can't win? It doesn't matter how much money she makes out of this - she is going to be the loser in everyone's eyes. There is nothing she can do now to repair her image - people are going to hate her guts. Of course, Heather may not care about that. In the end all she probably wants is the money. And it's possible that she may not even be capable of recognizing the hatred people feel toward her. She may be too deluded. The whole Dancing With the Stars move seems wacky to me - it's like she thinks people are going to embrace her. But if they do embrace you, Heather, it will only be to hold you down while they get the tar and feathers ready. My advice to you would be to take whatever settlement Paul wants to offer and just move to some far-off desert island. Spend the rest of your life hopping merrily on the sand. Cause if you stay in civilization, you will never be anything more than a peg-legged Yoko Ono.

The Enquirer's Lame Attempt At Smearing McCartney

Ex-Beatle Paul McCartney has received almost universal public support in his on-going divorce battle with Heather Mills. Clearly, McCartney has built up a lot of goodwill over the years. Enough that, when Mills comes out with accusations of abuse, and claims she has tapes to back up said accusations, most people are quick to defend Paul, and to hurl terrible insults at Mills, and make incredibly tasteless, though hilarious, jokes about her one-leggedness.

There are a few who have taken Mills' side in the affair however. Who knows what their reasons are. Maybe they have something personal against McCartney, or have consciously decided to swim against the tide, or maybe they just have a thing for stumps. Or, perhaps, they've just concluded that the McCartney-is-a-jerk angle is better for business.

Such would seem the case with The National Enquirer, which lately has taken a decidedly anti-Paul tack. In fact, one could almost accuse the Enquirer of attempting to smear McCartney. Witness this piece on their website, which hypes certain "bombshell tapes" they've acquired. And what is on these earth-shattering recordings? Evidence of Paul beating Heather? Testimony as to his general cruelty? Or proof that Paul has been a bit of an obnoxious jerk at various times in his life, especially when he was young?

The tapes, "exclusively" obtained by the Enquirer (perhaps because no one else thought they were worth anything), feature Paul's stepmother Angie and stepsister Ruth talking about certain incidents where Paul demonstrated himself to be not the most thoughtful or classy fellow in the world. In fact, the behavior they recount can only be characterized as boorish. In the first offered clip, Angie talks about a time when her husband, Paul's father, was suffering from crippling arthritis, and Paul, in a moment of apparent meanness, threw open a window and caused a cold gale to blow on the poor old man. When Angie told Paul to close the window, Paul replied by saying the old man wasn't really sick, and Angie and the doctors were trying to make a cripple of him. In the second clip, the stepsister Ruth talks about how she became large-breasted at a young age, and Paul made lewd remarks to her once when she was wrapped in a towel after having a bath. And in the third Ruth tells about a conversation she had with Paul when she was 20 where Paul suggested she overcome her financial troubles by becoming a prostitute.

Maybe there are some out there who will buy the Enquirer's angle, and see these recordings as stark evidence of McCartney's low character. Surely, his stepmother and stepsister see him as tyrannical, and maybe he was. But does any of this represent proof that he beat Heather, or beat Linda as Heather also claimed? And does it do anything to ameliorate Heather's gold-digger image? It all seems a bit desperate to me. An attempt at blowing certain instances of callous and perhaps even rotten behavior up into something larger. All right, so McCartney was a little dictatorial. But there's still no proof of real abuse, just a couple of bitter old women looking for pity, and a crass magazine trying to make stunning revelations out of material that barely qualifies as interesting.