Britney Spears Nip Slip Bikini Pictures In Miami

Britney Spears Totally Naked Showing Her Super Cute Sexy Shaved Pussy and Cute Juicy Soft Boobs and Pink Nipples Sitting on Bed Ready For Getting Fuck

Britney Spears Gets Fucked (Fake)

Britney Redefines Atrocious

This is Britney Saturday night after her concert, and presumably before the pool party she had at the hotel. I might be able to live with the absurd swimsuit cover-up or whatever that's supposed to be, if only it weren't for the hat. And the scraggly hair coming out the back and the...

Oh fuck, I can't take it anymore. Would someone please just run the bitch over? I'll pay you.

Grainy Image Of Britney Putting Foot In Pool

No, it's not Bigfoot or an alien - it's Britney Spears at a pool party in Miami after her "show" there. The Daily Mail has a whole big report on the great time Britney and her dancers had at the hotel in their bikinis. Of course they had a great time - they were all on drugs.

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Britney Goes Shopping

Britney got herself to Miami in spite of her airplane issues. Here we see her out on a shopping trip. There's Alli, hovering (always hovering). Britney's outfit is tame as her recent outfits go. I'm less offended by that hat than some of the others she's donned. I could do without the look of utter derangement though. Seems like she's off her meds.

It's Confirmed: Britney Spears Is The Biggest Idiot On Earth

For the benefit of those few earthlings still operating under the illusion that Britney Spears is not a complete mouth-breathing over-the-rainbow numbskull, I present the following item:

POP-STAR BRITNEY SPEARS STOPS FLIGHT OVER SEATS

Britney Spears, who has been attempting a comeback in recent weeks, made a colossal, shameless nuisance of herself Friday night at LAX.

At first, the other passengers had no idea what was causing the delay of their Miami-bound United Airlines flight - then the captain came on the intercom, apologetically explaining that a passenger had wanted to get off, and he was obliged to respect their wishes even though it caused everyone else to have to wait. It was only later that the passengers discovered the full truth - the one who'd been let off was Britney Spears, and her reason for wanting to vacate the plane was that it didn't have leather seats.

Yes, Britney Spears held up an entire United Airlines flight because her seat was not upholstered with cow-hide. Britney now believes her ass to be so privileged that she refuses to allow it to touch mere vinyl, or whatever else those seats were done with. Sort of ironic, given the way she's been clothing her ass lately:



We as a society need to do something about ridiculously spoiled celebs like Britney Spears delaying commercial flights for the most frivolous, self-indulgent of reasons. There were people on that plane who probably had important things they were getting to - things more important than Britney trying to get to Miami for another one of her farcical comeback shows, at any rate. But because Britney's rich she thinks she can ignore the rules of decent social conduct, inconveniencing scores of "regular" people in the process. Well I say ban Britney - yes, keep her off commercial flights altogether. Put her name on a watch-list - an asshole watch-list. If she ever tries boarding a flight again, treat her like a prospective terrorist - haul her into a little room and strip-search her, and make her sit there for hours without a phone or even a glass of water. Teach the whore a lesson in what happens to people who think they can do anything they please. Because, in the end, people like Britney are no better than terrorists. Self-important celebs like Britney disrupt the machinery of society by their thoughtlessness the same way terrorists do by their deliberate acts of mayhem and sabotage. In fact, I think Britney's behavior may be grounds for the bitch to be indefinitely detained. I say handcuff the slut, stick her on a C-130 and fly her to Guantanamo. Let her languish in a filthy cell for a few years with nothing but a Koran and a daily allowance of unleavened bread and flat Mountain Dew. Finally, a chance for George Douche to do something worthwhile for his fellow Americans.

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The On-Going Saga That Is Britney's Hair

This is Britney Spears's hair. Apparently, she has had extensions added to the stubble that has begun emerging from her previously shaved dome. Considering the damage she allegedly did to her hair from over-use of extensions in the first place, this seems like the most idiotic thing she could do. But idiocy is what we've come to expect from Britney - in fact, the day this bitch does something smart, the world may actually crack in half from humanity's collective shock.


I have stared into the face of stupidity, and yawned.

Britney Hos It Up

When did Britney turn into Brooke Hogan?

Britney To Mother Lynne - "Y'all Are Dead To Me."

Britney Spears has evidently cut the cord entirely between herself and mother Lynne, who Britney has described as "the stage mom from hell."

Britney, who is currently sort of on-tour, is so fed up with Lynne that, reportedly, she neglected to call her on her 52nd birthday earlier this month. Then, over Mother's Day, when Lynne was in the hospital with a bout of pneumonia, Britney refused to visit or even call her to wish her well.

The current unpleasantness between Britney and Lynne is believed to stem from Britney's well-publicized rehab trip earlier this year. It is Britney's contention that postpartum depression was to blame for her erratic behavior, but Lynne and since-fired manager Larry Rudolph insisted she seek drug and alcohol treatment. Friends say Britney refuses to forgive Lynne for this "betrayal."

So Lynne Spears has been officially exiled from Britney's support group, to be replaced by her cousin Alli, who has become a familiar presence in Britney's paparazzi photos. I hope, however, that Alli is paying close attention to these stories about Britney and her mother. These are two people who had as tight a bond as you can have, and yet resentment and downright anger corroded those ties - and now Britney is so mad at Lynne that, even though Lynne could've been dying in that hospital, she wouldn't even pick up a phone and call to see how she was doing. Her own mother she treats this way - and how will she treat you, Alli, if she decides that you have "betrayed" her too? Clearly, Britney has become delusional and paranoid. And people in that state will lash out irrationally even against those who are trying to help them most. In the end, it's unlikely Britney will have anyone left in her life except sycophants and yes-people. Of course, even the ass-kissers won't stick around forever - as soon as the gravy train stops rolling they'll be out of there.

I don't need to point out, do I, the current state of the Britney gravy train?

(source)

Britney's Drunken Couch Romp

Britney Spears can tell people she's off the sauce, but she's obviously lying through her teeth. According to Page 6's Cindy Adams, Britney was at Teddy's this weekend, at a party for some kind of West Coast promotion group - and despite the best efforts of security guards to block off the area, witnesses saw Britney and some of her friends jumping up and down on a couch in their underwear. Of course, this doesn't prove that Britney was drinking - Tom Cruise doesn't drink much that we know of, and he still went crazy on Oprah's furniture. Maybe Britney is also in love with Katie Holmes? Um...no. Britney was drunk. A waitress was reportedly told to bring the pop-slut a Red Bull, but witnesses saw her swilling liquor that others in her party had ordered. Tricky Britney. But we're not fooled - she's as big a drunk-ass ho as she was before rehab. Her current comeback "tour" is sure to be derailed by her partying and wackiness, no matter how hard her cousin Allie works to keep her shit together. First you're jumping on a couch, then you're shaving your head and screaming that you're the anti-Christ. Then you're joining Scientology and, well, it's pretty much over.

(source)

Hats Are A Family Thing For The Spearses

It wasn't enough for Britney to go around in a bunch of stupid hats - now she's begun slapping them on Sean Preston too. This isn't so bad, but imagine the outrage if Britney shaves his dome and starts dressing him in torn fishnets.

Britney Ups The Ante Again

I'm thinking about starting a whole new blog where all I do is document Britney's fashion-related crimes against decency. Here's the latest. Um, I'm thinking those socks may have been stolen...from the locker room of the world's gayest basketball team. The hat I'm not even going to talk about; I'm so fucking sick of the hats. The outfit looks like something a hooker would wear to the gym - just don't stare at it too long or your rods or cones or whatever they call those things that let you see colors will wear out and everything will look like the Wall Street Journal. Oh, and if Johnny Knoxville were in a girlie mood - yup, he'd wear those glasses. Kill me now.

Britney's New Look

Britney Spears goes out with a towel wrapped around her chin and neck. This is what Britney comes up with when she decides to screw with everyone. "Hey, look at me, I'm so wacky y'all." She's really sticking it to those paps, isn't she? Gosh, next she'll probably have a red bandanna hanging out the back of her pants, or a piece of gum stuck to her cheek, or she'll walk out carrying Sean Preston upside-down by the foot. Actually, I think she already does that last one all the time. But you get my drift.

A Picture's Worth A Thousand Words...

Sean Preston and his "Save Me" face. Nice try Britney, but we know you'd eat him if you thought you could get away with it.

Kevin Federline Calls Howie Day Trash

Britney's ex Kevin Federline is less-than-impressed by her new love-interest, singer Howie Day. Here's what a source told Star magazine about Federline's diss:

When Kevin heard [Britney and Howie] had a sleepover at her house, everyone wanted to know about it. He lit up a cigarette and said he guessed you have to head to the dump to find trash, referring to how Britney and Howie met while in rehab.

I think that's a bit of a low-blow. Okay, so Howie does have a little history of being less-than-nice to women. But a piece of trash?

Oh, but Kevin isn't the only one who thinks this. The Star source continues:

People have told Britney point-blank this guy has a permanent barstool in the Loser Lounge. I was with her when one of her most trusted girlfriends told her, "You cannot let this guy into your life — after he gets a little publicity he will be gone." But when people say stuff like that, it’s music to Britney’s ears. She likes the drama.

So let me get this straight - according to this individual, Britney actually wants to be used like a Kleenex and tossed away, because she "likes the drama?" Honey, that ain't a melodramatic bent you're describing - that's masochism. Crazy-ass Britney - she probably likes having people slap her around and cum in her hair too. Shit, she probably got rid of Federline because he wasn't freaky enough. "You want me to do what to your what?" Now, this Howie Day character - he's probably right up Britney's alley. A shit-smearer. Hell they probably feed it to each other. Howie probably takes a big dump and then pushes Britney's face into it. That chick is wack.

(source)

Britney Goes Shopping - Without A Hat On

Britney's gone from hats to headbands, but still looks like a dumb-ass. Hey, I wonder what Britney thinks about her old pal Paris going to jail. God, I hope Britney doesn't decide to emulate Paris by getting herself thrown in the slammer too. This could be the new celebutard trend. Sure - Britney copied Paris's cooch-baring and wild partying; why not emulate her criminality as well? Of course Britney has already had her own problems with car-related violations. Not strapping her kids into the car-seats properly and all that. That won't be a problem now, though, as Britney never sees her kids. At this point I don't think Britney even remembers that she has them. But that's okay because she has a nice lamp now.

Britney Wears A Dirty Hat

Britney Spears demonstrates once again that she takes seriously her position as a role model to young people. So can we now look forward to whole scads of preteens running around in headwear emblazoned with profanities per Britney's example? Actually, probably not. Britney has become pretty much irrelevant to the tween set at this point. Besides, tweens have been wearing profane clothing for years. Britney is actually the follower in this one. Seriously, your average twelve-year-old these days makes Britney look like a prude.

Britney Tour Update

Your daily Britney comeback tour update:

She played in L.A. last night. The show lasted 11 minutes. She wore a different wig. Lindsay Lohan showed up. I hate everything and everyone.

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Britney Not Serious About Comeback

It has become abundantly clear, after only two shows, that Britney Spears is not actually serious about mounting a comeback.

Going by eyewitness reports, to call the performances "perfunctory" would be doing them a kindness. The first show, two nights ago in San Diego, featured Spears performing a bachelor party dance routine while lip-syncing a few of her popular hits. It lasted all of 14 minutes. The second show, last night in Anaheim, sported the same set-list, the same moves, the same Pussycat Dolls-like back-up dancers - except that it only lasted 12 minutes, and reportedly, Britney didn't bother even moving her lips with the songs, but chose instead to chomp gum while performing her awkward gyrations.

Still, there were people willing to give Britney a positive review. Said one optimistic attendee of last night's Anaheim gig:

It was short, it was good. She looked good, she did her thing.

Her thing being, apparently, gypping people who shelled out $500 for a single ticket. Then again, if you're any kind of Spears fan, you must be used to getting gypped. Her entire career has been a sham. She was never anything more than a product of studio fakery and music video glitz - a performing robot. Clearly, if one judges by the accounts of Spears's two comeback shows, the robot has become sputtery and in need of new software.

So, Britney Spears has thus far faked her way through two shows - but will she be able to fake her way through a whole resurgence? Unlikely. However, one assumes there will always be nitwits willing to pay money to see her. And there will also always be the morbidly curious, who want to witness a meltdown, or at the very least a catastrophic wig malfunction. Fakeness, in the current cultural climate, is no sin. Just ask Paris Hilton.

(source 1, source 2)